I am sure these thoughts have come to you when you really feel that you wanted to download everything to the Guru. But the reluctance to come ahead is too much of a hinderance.
You look at the body of the Guru and see Him as a human being with such human qualities. With all kinds of likes and dislikes. Anger and greed, wants and desires. Living with a family like any other mundane family man. Having a wife, parents and children. Eating, drinking and exhibiting all symptoms of a human. Showing partial attitude, going around with one particular devotee always and extremely biased towards his family.
Even His dressing sense and demeanor is very much earthly. On top of it all He doesn’t even pay attention to you. He is always lost with one particular person answering all questions of that one. When He gives money also, He does it to one of His closest.
You wonder what use it would be to ask Him for time? Would He give you any? Why should He give you, anyway? Your spouse or friend who is His devotee, is always talking about Him and they never give you time. They are always chatting with Him. He hogs all their time and life. He is very partial towards you so He won’t even consider you, ever.
These are some of the thoughts which plague the minds of devotees who are actually keen to have a satsang with the Guru. Few other things that contribute towards non acceptance of the Guru in your world is the inadequacy you feel for your level of knowledge. You think that His knowledge is so deep, so why would He answer your silliest and stupidest question? That would mean coming down from the pedestal. You are afraid since He may ask you for some money or some other thing. Anyway, bias also appears due to something that your relative has given Him which shouldn’t have been given. You resent that person since you have formed preconceived notions. He doesn’t even wear clothes of a Guru!!!
Now listen to what the Guru says.
Everyone is a child to the Guru. He has no bias against any child of His, just like a mother. He treats everyone exactly in the way they deserve to be treated. He knows, like a mother, what is to be offered to each and everyone. Just as Ramakrishnaji said. The Guru offers to His devotees exactly as a mother makes fried fish for one child, fish curry to another and fish soup to the third. This just goes to show His unearthly compassion for all His devotees.
With some, He does The Bhagvad Gita, with another Sri Sai Satcharitra, with someone else Tripura Rahasyam, another learns The Bible or Nag Hammadi, someone asks for just poetry or bhajans and so on. He does exactly as per the taste of that person. He has perfect knowledge about everyone’s capacity and understanding. He offers only that which they can digest.
To live in the society like a normal human being without any pretenses is being very noble. Look at Ramakrishnaji, Kabir, Meera Bai, Tukaram, Saibaba, Lahiri Mahashay, etc.. These were householders living with wives and children. They wore simple clothes and not the clothes of an itinerant Sadhu. They ate simple food, even fish and meat.
If you look at their avatar then you will surely be deceived since they behaved very normally. Ate and drank like normal people. They spoke normal language of a householder too. They practice their spirituality incognito. Nor are they interested in gathering hoards of disciples or name and fame. They do not draw attention towards themselves outside their own circles. Anyone could come and talk to them. They have absolutely no bias against anyone. They spew fire at even the one devotee who seems closer to them.
Some form the inner circle of the Guru and others feel that they just should be regular devotees. Those who form the inner circle have greater tasks to perform. They are having more seva bhavana than others. Some come to listen and some only sleep in a satsang. Both are equally dear to the Guru. He lives with all of them equally.
It’s what you give is what you get thousand fold. Since He doesn’t care much for money or gifts, food or lodgings, etcetera, He cannot be bought by anything at all.
So when you approach the Sadguru, know that you should go there with a pure heart alone and only with the intention of learning and for spiritual emancipation. Never go with some grudge or silly demands. He will solve all your issues and problems. Tell Him in confidence and He will reward you with insight.
He is the divine who has taken birth as a human for the good of mankind. He is the true mother and father. So go to Him with open arms and love. He will embrace you forever when you surrender with love and devotion.
The intimate bonding that happens between the mother and child is when she holds her…